Numb

I found out about 40 minutes ago that my aunt has 2 weeks to live and maybe 6 months if the start the "super agressive" chemo on Monday. We found out a week ago that she had lung cancer. Her son died last August. Add this to Sam's grandfather passing away two weeks ago, and all the other stresses of owning two businesses, soon to be three, and working a part-time job, I'm a bit numb.

My "aunt" is like a second grand-mother to me - she is my grand-mother's best friend, so while not technically my aunt, she has been around my whole life and always referred to herself as "Aunt Esmerlda Zutischny."

She was the one who, when I was the mother of a 10 month old and about 6 minutes pregnant with my second, told me (while others were saying how great it was) "it's going to be the worst year of your life." I was speechless. About 6 months after my second son was born and I felt like crap, was exhausted, and felt like I had not spoken more than two words to an adult human being forever, I saw her. I went to her and said "Thank you SOOO much."

"For what?" was her somewhat puzzled response.

I smiled with what energy I had, and said "For telling me how miserable it was going to be. I expected things to be a major disaster and it turned out to be about two steps above that, so thanks!"

She chuckled, and helped watch the baby and entertained the two year old for awhile and I think that I got a few moments of peace, or beach time, or something. the particulars are fuzzy, but the memory of her always telling it like it is, being there for anyone, and always making you smile will live on forever.

CSA

I signed up today for a CSA-Community Supported Agriculture. I'm super excited! It's a totally affordable way to get fresh, local produce. Often it's even organic, even if it's not certified organic (it's quite expensive to get the certification).

Each week from June thru November I'll get a share of fresh fruits and vegetables that should feed the whole family for a week!

This makes me so happy to be supporting a local farm, getting to eat great tasting food and also eat more healthfully. I'm so looking forward to fresh tomatoes, zucchini, cucumbers..mmm my mouth is watering just thinking about it.
Maybe I can learn how to can things for the winter...